Wednesday, September 27, 2006

Johari Window

This is actually quite interesting. I received an email today from a friend about this. When you click on the link below, a new window pops up and you will need to choose five adjectives that you think describes me. It links the adjectives and it compares them to what others say. You can even start one for yourself. Check it out.

Daniel 4

Tonight, was my Biblestudy, for the series on Daniel by Beth Moore. I am really enjoying this study. Tonight's session and this week's homework is on chapter 4. This chapter is about King Nebuchadnezzar's second dream, and basically it is written in first person by King Nebuchadnezzar. He looses his kingdom for some years, until he recognizes who God is, and that he is the ruler of the world. But what is so good, is what Beth Moore shares about this chapter, it speaks to me.

The following are my notes that I wrote in the margarins of the two pages covering the video teaching session. Some are things Beth Moore says, and others are questions or comments I write about myself.

Nebuchadnezzar stopped ruling Babylon, he allowed Babylon to rule him. I have asked myself before, what part of Babylon do I allow to rule me? You are probably asking, what do you mean what part of Babylon is ruling you? Today's Babylon is basically the trappings of the world. How beauty and self-image is important. Body size. How much money am I making? Things like that. How self-absorbed am I? I can get self-absorbed. We all can at times. Am I content with what I have, or do I need more to be happy? How often do I show mercy to the poor? Here is the Babylon mentality" "I am, and there is none besides me." That is found in Isaiah 47.

To help us change this thinking, we are chastised by God. Discipline by God. We are pruned by God. We will suffer, go through trials to learn a lesson, for God to be glorified. Here are some things I wrote about this. My areas of chatisement will only go so far, because God cares. That is why he prunes me. The idea of cutting back, is so that Iwill grow back and produce fruit. God allows satan to sift us, because we need something, in our life, to be sifted. This sifting brings us back to God. I am not better than anybody I have taught or worked with. Is there anything in my life that God needs to work on in my life? The following quote is from Charles Swindoll from a book he wrote about Daniel: "God's patience is geared toward our repentance."

Both of God's patience and discipline sets limits. I am so thankful to what God has been doing in my heart this year, and for the things he is showing me about him. More reasons for me to praise and glorify God.

Tuesday, September 26, 2006

God Answers Prayers

No job, yet! The title might make one think I have a job, but sorry, no. We all have things we have been praying about to God. We can get any of the three answers he gives, "Yes", "No", or "Wait". Some answers come immediately as a "Yes" or "No". Otherwise, they are all "Wait", or acutally it seems like he isn't answering at all. Like, God is having me to wait for the job that I need.

I have requests that I have been praying about off and on for years, and I mean years. Just in the past week, I received an answer of "Yes" and "Wait". My cousin is open and willing to have the Lord work in her heart, and she has started attending church again. Those are both yes. The wait, is that God is still working in her heart on other issues. I am very happy to get this news. This is something I have been praying about off and on for over twenty years.

The Lord has been working in my heart this past year. I know, because I have become more open to certain things, and willing to look at things in a different way. That is an aswer to some people's prayers.

We are told to pray, which builds our faith and trust in God. but waiting for his answers can be very hart, but so is being opened to the answer that is not what we are expecting to receive. I was not expecting to still be not be working come the end of September. I was expecting to be teaching somewhere in the DFW area, but I am not. It has been hard to accept the Lord's plan and answer to my request. Truthfully, I do not miss all of the aspect of teaching as I thought I would. I do not miss the bad behavior, but I do miss the ineraction with my students, the actual teaching part, and seeing the growth in my students' lives.

I thank you and praise you for what you are doing in my life and in the lives of all of my family and friends. You are awesome! You know so much better than we do. We do not know as much as we think we do. In your time, I know you will reveal the plans for my life and for the lives of all I know, plans to prosper us, not to harm us, plans to glorify you. Thank you for walking beside me during this rough time in my life. Thank you for the people who are praying for me. Please bless them in what they are doing for you. I love you father.

Thursday, September 21, 2006

Firey Furnance

My Wednesday night Biblestudy is the Beth Moore study on the book of Daniel. Last night's session and this week's homework is on the third chapter. Beth Moore states three scenarios for when we go through our own firey furnance. Choice A: God delivers us from it. Our faith is built, because we pray and ask people to pray with us, and God answers yes. Choice B: God delievers us through it. We walks along side of us. We pray and God basically answers wait. Our faith is refined. We pray and pray, and it is hard to understand why we are going through this. At the end there is a miracle, and when we look back, we see small miracles that happened along the way. Choice C: We can be delivered by the fire straight into his arms. Our faith is perfected. (Dying and going up to Heaven).

We will never escape trials entirely. We will always be given some type of trail at different times during our life. The question is, what is our heart attitude and where is our faith being placed. God's plans are not to harm us, but the exact opposite of that. God allows us to go through the firey furnance, os that our bonds will be burned off/away, to be freed from that bondage of sin. What is it that God is working on in my heart? I do not know. All I do know is that through this firey furnance I am walking through, He will be glorified!

How is my faith in all of this? I know God has a job out there for me. In his time, he will reveal it to me, and open that door. I do hope it is here in Dallas, TX. I have asked him to work on my heart attitude to be accepting of his answer when he gives it to me. Is there something I need to learn from this whole experience? I do not know. I do not know why God is allowing me to endure months without a job. It is fustrating at times, and discouraging at times. I just need to keep my eyes on him, the perfecter and author of my faith. (Hebrews 12:1-2) According to Hebrews 11:1, faith is the substance of things not seen. I have faith in the Lord, that he will lead me to the new job that is right for me. One where I will be the salt and light for him in the workplace. Until it happens, I just need to wait upon him, and have faith, that what he is doing is for my own good. God will answer my prayer in his time, not in my time, but in his time. Praise God for that!

Tuesday, September 12, 2006

A Deadline has been set

Monday, was my first meeting with my campaign manager at Chandler Hill Partners. I have another one Thursday afternoon. I do know we are going to work on interviewing skills, since I have a phone interview next with Clark County School District, one of the largest school districts in the country. This interview is to see if I make it into the selection process, for further interviews for possible jobs. The homework I have to do for CHP is easy and doesn't take me long to do. Plus I do it on the hard copy I have been given, before I do it online.

A deadline has been set. If I have not found something to support me, either an actual job, or a part time job, by the end of October, my dad will come down to move me back home to OH. Moving back home is not what I want to do. I love home, and look forward to my visit, I just do not want to live there. I want to be living in Dallas, TX. Maybe, the Lord wants me back home. I have no idea why the Lord is allowing me to go through this. Am I supposed to be learning a lesson, is it for his glory, is it for a consequence, what is God's will for me in this. I have lots and lots of people praying for me. God's will be done on Earth as it is in Heaven. I mean that.

I am hurting inside, and cried a lot last night. I do not have a thankful heart for this. I told God that. Someday, I will have a thankful heart for what I am going through, right now, I do not. The Lord has plans to prosper me, not to harm me. I wish I knew what his plans were. Someday, I will look back and see his hand in all of this, and say how stupid I could be during this whole period.

Saturday, September 09, 2006

Job hunting help

I have been looking for a job for six months, and unemployed for a little over 3 months. I've been doing some thinking, over the past ten years of different times looking for a job, I've had a hard time doing so. I'm finally going to get some help! I've become a client of Chandler Hill Partners. Check out their website at

They will be working with me on my interviewing skills, helping me to market myself better, showing me areas that I should think about applying to, etc. Plus, they have contacts that I do not have. I will be given homework assignments that I will have to do. The more I put into it, the more I will get from this. I need help, plus I am not afraid to work. I am so ready to go back to work! I have been bored!!!!!!!!!

The best thing, is that after I get hired, they will still stay in touch, and help me to maybe get a raise come review time, see what I can do for getting a promotion, etc. Plus, it gives them another contact. If I hear of openings, I could let them know, and they can always send people my way to that company.

My first homework assignment is finished. I have my first meeting with my campaign manager Monday afternoon. I hope there is only a couple of more months being unemployed.

If I do not teach again for awhile, I am okay about that. I love teaching! I want to be able to use my teaching skills somehow.

I have a phone interview with Clark County School District on the 22nd. That interview will determine if I get put into the selection process for a job. By the way, Clark County is the county of the residence of Las Vegas. One of the top five school districts in the U.S.

Monday, September 04, 2006

The World Trade Center

Five years from next Monday, September 11, is the five year anniversary of what happened that day in NYC, PA, and D.C. The United States was attacked, and we went to war. There are a lot of people out there who do not agree with President Bush, but he is the President that our good Lord has given to run our country.
Sometime last month, a new movie premiered that is directed by Oliver Stone and stars Nicholas Cage. The movie is titled The World Trade Center. The movie is about what happened that day, but mostly about two NYC Port Authority Police Officers who got trapped in the rubble of the towers after they collapsed. Only 20 people were pulled out alive from the rubble. These two police officers were numbers 18 and 19. Seeing the line of world's finest lined up, passing the baskets of each of these two officers was unblievable and moving.
I saw the movie this afternoon. It does bring tears to your eyes. Whenever you see it, make sure you have kleenex to wipe away the tears.
I believe our country is ready for this movie. I hope a huge number of people go see it and remember why we went to war. Especially those who are against President Bush. They need a reminder as to why we are at war. Go see this movie, and remember why we are fighting over there in the Middle East. We are fighting for Freedom!!!!!!!!!!!